is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize