I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize
