i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
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