ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
