we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
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