Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize
