She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Randomize
