Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
