I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
it's not cheating when I paid for it
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
