So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
