There is no way he is gay with that hair.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
