lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Randomize
