Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
