she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Can I color on your dick again?
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
