I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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