In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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