dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
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