i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Randomize
