In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
