My friends, they love my intelligence
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
I currently don't understand fingers.
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