gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
operation have a gay friend backfired
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Randomize
