Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
