she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Even my vagina gasped.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
