I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Randomize