We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
