her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
