she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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