maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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