Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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