11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
Cover your peen. We're going out.
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