Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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