Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize
