he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
