Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
My cat gives me a boner
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
