So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize
