who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Randomize
