With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
