i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize
