Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Randomize
