i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize