I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Randomize
