I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
just tell him i said nine months
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
