I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
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