so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
