Small penises have feelings too.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
I use my feet as sexual weapons
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