Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Randomize
