Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
