He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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