Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Randomize