There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Randomize