On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
