He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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